A Biblical Example of Caring for Others

“And behold, a lawyer stood up and said, to test him: Master, by doing what will I inherit eternal life? He said to him: What is written in the law? How do you read? He answered and said, You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your strength, and with all your mind; and your neighbor as yourself. And he said to him: You have answered well; do this, and you will live.

But he, wanting to justify himself, said to Jesus: And who is my neighbor? Jesus answering, he said: A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and he fell among robbers, and they robbed him; and wounding him, they went away, leaving him half dead.

It happened that a priest came down that road, and seeing him, passed by. Also a Levite, coming near that place, and seeing him, passed by. But a Samaritan, who was on his way, came near him, and seeing him, was moved to mercy; and coming near, he bandaged his wounds, pouring oil and wine on them; and putting him on his mount, he took him to the inn, and took care of him. Another day when leaving, he took out two denarii, and gave them to the innkeeper, and said: Take care of him; and whatever you spend extra, I’ll pay you back when I get back.

Who, then, of these three do you think was a neighbor to the one who fell into the hands of the robbers? He said: The one who showed mercy to him. Then Jesus said to him: Go, and do the same”. (Luke 10:25,37)

“Why, in the context of caring for another, have previously good relationships become so painful and unhealthy?”

Unresolved conflicts from the past surface when put under the pressure of caring for someone on a daily basis.

“Count it all joy, my brethren, when you find yourself in various trials, knowing that the trial of your faith produces patience. But have patience with his complete work, so that you may be perfect and complete, without lacking anything.¨ (James 1:2,4)

“I am doing everything that is expected of me, so why do I still feel inadequate?”

Because instead of trusting in the Spirit of Christ, you have surrendered control of your life to the paralyzing attitudes of…

  • Perfectionism. Wanting to be the “perfect Christian”

“Not that we are competent on our own to think anything of ourselves, but that our competence comes from God.” (2 Corinthians 3:5)

  • Hyperfunctional… Trying to “please everyone”

“Therefore we try also, whether absent or present, to be pleasing to [the Lord]. For it is necessary for all of us to appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive according to what he has done while in the body, be it good or bad.” (2 Corinthians 5:9,10)

  • Pride… The idea that you can “fix everything”

“When pride comes, dishonor also comes; but with the humble is wisdom.” (Proverbs 11:2).

The bondage of resentment

Taking care of another person all the time can be very demanding. Don’t be surprised if negative thoughts come to you. These are the natural result of physical and emotional fatigue. Many caregivers believe that they cannot escape the prison of so much responsibility. Still, God often uses those circumstances to turn our hearts back to him.

Pressured… overwhelmed, helpless

Resentful… angry and bitter

Physically exhausted… fatigued

Lonely… alone and misunderstood

Forgotten… feels unappreciated

“Because you tested us, O God; You rehearsed us how silver is refined. You put us in the net; You put a heavy load on our loins.” (Psalms 66:10,11)

Checklist for when the caregiver is in crisis

  • Am I easily annoyed with my loved ones?
  • Am I becoming more intolerant of others?
  • Am I declining most invitations to mingle with others?
  • Do I feel hurt when no one appreciates my effort?
  • Do I get angry when family members don’t help me?
  • Do I feel trapped by this responsibility?
  • Do I feel manipulated?
  • Do I lose sleep and don’t exercise regularly?
  • Am I so overwhelmed that I am no longer as effective in caring for this person?
  • Am I forgetting myself because of the constant demand to take care of others?
  • Am I too busy to spend time alone with God?
  • Do I feel guilty when I take time for myself?

“Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God, so that he may exalt you when the time is right; casting all your anxiety on him, because he cares for you.” (1 Peter 5:6,7)

Key verse to memorize

“Come to me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28)

Key passage to read and meditate

Galatians 6:7,10

Ways friends show their love

  • Send letters and notes.
  • Visit hospitals and nursing homes.
  • Send flowers or small gifts.
  • Cooperate with meals or full meals.
  • Accompany the patient to walk or do some outdoor activity.
  • Offer to do the laundry and clean the house.
  • Be an attentive and willing listener.
  • Show emotional and physical affection.
  • Cooperate financially.
  • Become a prayer warrior.

“For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.” (Ephesians 2:10)

It is not a prison, but a privilege

Ask God to give you a heart of service. (Ephesians 6:7)

Recognize that God has chosen you for that specific assignment. (Romans 8:28)

Identify the attitudes that keep you from responding to God. (Psalms 51:10)

Value this opportunity, knowing that it is temporary. (1 Peter 1:6)

Invest your life in the lives of others. (Galatians 6:2)

Just take one day at a time. (Psalms 118:24)

Surrender your weakness to Christ and trust in his power. (Philippians 4:13)

Put your expectations aside. (Proverbs 12:25)

Insist on deeper intimacy with God. (Psalms 139:7,10)